Hey Amit,
How are you? Hope your mind is feeling better. I was present during the Senate meeting and turn my back when you came to the mike. But I did listen to your remarks, including with much attention when you mentioned that you consider everyone present there your “friends.” So, I hope it’s fine that I’m writing to you from my personal email account and that I call you Amit.
But you see, it already feels awkward. The previous paragraph would sound very weird for me to write to someone I see as a friend. I’m not saying that you don’t consider me your friend. Rather, I’m trying to understand why I don’t consider you as part of my circle of people.
For now, let’s assume that we are in fact friends. But, in the spirit of academia and essayist investigations, I want to revise our friendship. I proceed in the good faith you mentioned in your “100 days plan.”
When I think about our friendship, I can count only four instances in which we have crossed words:
– Around October 2013, in a SOGS-SGPS meeting, in my position as VP External. I asked some questions directly to you. You didn’t respond my questions; rather, you went into a tangent for thirty minutes and when I tried to say something so we could ‘move forward’ (as you like to say), you didn’t let me talk. (A friend doesn’t do that)
– It must have been April 2014 when I saw you outside the UC and I asked you if it were true that your house has become a “TA shelter” in reference to the April Fool’s Day issue of The Gazette. You seemed lost and said “sure, sure, you can come for dinner.” I didn’t hear back from you about the dinner…
– Summer of 2014 during the TA Awards Ceremony. I was there in representation of PSAC 610 and said a couple of words in the line of “I won’t say much apart from thanking you and congratulating you all for your wonderful work as TAs, but I’m sure we’re all hungry!” People laughed. Then, when the lunch was served (I’m diabetic by the way, but my friends know that), you stood up and said something like “since we’re all too hungry like Jaime we can eat!” I felt ashamed. People laughed timidly and didn’t know what to do or say. Luckily, they did eat their lunch. We were all hungry. I mean, you know how much a TA makes per term, right? My friends do know those things.
– Just a couple of weeks ago, at a gathering for faculty with publications during the last year. (Many of them adjuncts, I imagine you knew). You came to me and asked me what was happening in Toronto. I explained to you about the strikes. I mean, you must be very busy so cannot keep up with all the news. Then you told me “Oh, that’s good, then you all activists will be very tired and will not do the same at Western.” What can I say in response to that?
It’s been difficult times. For me too. I have two kids. (My friends know that). If it weren’t for the UCCB (look it up on Google) and other assistance programs and funds outside the university, Luna and Alejandro would be… no, I don’t even want to imagine. But it’s the true.
Tomorrow night I’m proctoring a final exam. From 7 to 10pm. My students were not happy with the scheduling.
There are so many things to fix, Amit. Many things. But my friends already know that.
I have lost my confidence in you. I tried, and this is an honest email you’re receiving. Writing helps me to think things over.
No, you don’t have my confidence. But at least you should know that. My friends already did before sending this email.
But I do wish you the best luck in your future endeavours,
Jaime
ps – grad students only get 250mb in their UWO accounts. Many times emails get bounced back and communication between faculty-students or students-students can be difficult. Yes, via email.
Jaime Román Brenes Reyes 